The Princess Disease: How To Know If You Or A Loved One is Afflicted

A common disease amongst Generation Y, the Princess Disease develops in the early childhood stages of females with notable symptoms appearing in the teenage years. However, the Princess Disease does not begin to negatively affect the patient until the mid twenties. Symptoms of the Princess Disease or “PD” include but are not limited to the  extreme need for attention, a love of stages/ elevated surfaces and the infliction of incredibly high standards on men.

Symptoms:

Sufferers of Princess Disease frequently feel a sense of entitlement and expect constant rewards for what they deem “good” behavior, which others would classify as normal actions not worthy of rewarding.

Gifts are expected for all holidays including “Martin Luther King, Jr. Day” and Princess women have been known to give gifts to themselves when they do not receive gifts from others.

Those with PD experience a larger percentage of debt than non-PDers. Princess women are unable to spend within their means since they believe themselves to be of the same status as Ashley Tisdale or Minka Kelly.

PD leads to increased levels of independence and defiance. Patients are frequently heard saying variations of “Don’t tell me what to do” and “I can do it on my own” from an early age.

Sufferers of Princess Disease are constantly looking for Prince Charming and have drawn up several diagrams to explain who he is and how to spot him. Typically linked to an obsession with weddings.

Causes:

Princess Disease has been linked to the prolificness of Disney movies and Disney Princess memorabilia, each sufferer quickly able to note their favorite Disney Princess and why.

PD has also been linked to 1990-era school systems awarding children with “Super Swimming Sweetheart” and “Cleanest Desk 3rd Grade” awards.

Many women diagnosed with Princess Disease have been photographed wearing and/or owning  something that reads “Daddy’s Little Girl” at some point in their life.

Treatment:

Alcohol and medication have been found to exacerbate the symptoms of the Princess Disease, often causing tantrums, tabletop dancing and diva-like behavior, so no prescription is available at this time. However, volunteering and wearing flats (to keep PD-ers closer to the planet earth as high heels naturally cause wearers to feel superior) abate the symptoms of PD.

See a Doctor If:

You have been broken up with, partner citing “high maintenance” or “judgmental” as chief causes.

You think Kim K. is a role model and/or down to earth.